Aw, look at poor little Roscoe. All bailed up to have his nuts cut off.
Man, talk about your king-hell bummers! Incidentally, this is how they tie your tubes too!
Look it up. They knock you out, strap you down, slit a hole in yr ‘taint’ and then they reach in and tie that shit up real good so you can’t make any more babies! My old man had his tubes tied back in the 80′s, I’ll never forget the day he came back from the hospital. I watched through the living room window as he slowly moved his body out of the car, all bent forward and prostrate like the guy from Led Zeppelin IV. As Mom closed the car door for him, he looked up and saw me in the window, gave a pained smile and began shuffling towards the house. I opened the front door and he edged past me into the hall. “Are you OK dad?” I asked, “What’d you reckon?” he snapped, heading for his bedroom. Then he turned back, “Do you wanna see the stitches” Yes but not really, I said. “have a look” he said, “it’s pretty gnarly” Jesus, I thought, this doesn’t happen in other families. Then, with a wince, he said “Check it out” and pulled his bruised ball-sack up to reveal the blackest, most swollen, messed up looking taint I have ever seen…
So, of the two taints I’ve seen in my life… have I actually seen my own taint?
I don’t think so… So I’ve seen one then, my dad’s…
Whatever, the point is- my dad’s whole ball-bag region looked like it had gone 10 rounds with Sugar Ray Leonard and a box-cutter. “Pretty bad huh?” he said, gently lowering his now redundant appendage, I grimaced, “Yeah dad, it looks really fucked-up!”
“Language” he said. I said sorry and made him a cup of tea.

BANG! There goes another one,
Screaming as it goes.
It’s getting high,
Up in the sky,
And fizzle – there she blows!

WHOOSH! Up high above the house,
Behind a trail of sparks.
Yellow, orange,
Red and white,
Exploding in the dark!

BAM! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!
MY HAND! MY HAND!
JESUS! OH JESUS!
OH FUCK! JESUS! SHIT!
OH FUCKING HELL!
FUCK! HELP! FUCK!

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