Morning, shit, Good afternoon…

So, remember last week when I was going on about Updike’s Rabbit, Run? Can anyone tell me what the fuck is wrong with the protagonist, Rabbit Angstrom? He’s a total dick! I don’t like him at all, and I cant see myself reading the other four books in the series. Please write and explain. Be sure to use the noun ‘Ennui’.
Now, on to issues of greater import.
I woke up really late today, and now I have zero time to put up anything interesting here. So here’s what I’m a do…

Tell you about the time I went to jail!

Actually, that’s pretty boring. All I did was piss in an alley on my way home from a bar and they threw me in with a car theif overnight. Pretty uneventful.
However, the second time I went to jail is a little more interesting… but still not really worth talking about.
But I want to waste some of your time, so here goes-

The second time I got locked up was so stupid. I got nailed by undercover cops while buying weed off a hippy. Stupid fucking hippy. I’m sure he was in on it. Godamn sting operation to catch me buying a twenty bag of Alaskan Thunder Fuck. Ridiculous.
And everyone was acting all ” Jump St”. Christ, it was embarrassing. It was like I’d been dragged into a really shitty PSA commercial where I was forced to play the the main character-
Jason the contrite ‘drug-addict’.

“You’re going down,Crombie, unless you tell us where you got the stuff.”
“I told you already, I bought it off the hippy.”
“Don’t get wise with us, Crombie. We see punks like you everyday. You’ll talk, even if we have to make you talk.”
“What? I am talking! The hippy! I bought the weed off the hippy! Him! The guy I’m pointing at!”
“Tough guy, huh? Well tough guy, maybe you’ll start singing us a song when we get tough, yeah?”

I thought once we’d got down to the precinct it’d all be over and I could stop vomiting into my mouth, but even the cell they threw me in was a cringe-worthy cliche fest! Some guy playing a harmonica through the bars, another dude repeating “I’m going crazy in here Johnny! Crazy I tells ya!” and some big fat guy leisurely running a finger up and down my cheek, telling me I sure was pretty.
Eventually I realized my best defense would be to go along with the whole thing and let myself be traded for cigarettes and gum. I was only in for three hours but I just thought I’d better contribute.

Here’s that hilarious scene from Midnight Express!

Does anyone know code for wordpress? We need to put the little by-line back in the top right corner of the posts.