We’ve always said you should do everything for the lord, not for man. If you build a house- do it for the lord. If you help an old lady cross the street- do it for the lord. If you get a hard-on from taxidermy- do it for the lord.
Do it all for the lord. All of it. Even shredding the gnar. Shred for the lord. He made you out of his own private batch of Fimo, the least you can do is skate for him.
And if you are going to skate for the lord, why not do it on a Gay™ Skateboard? Man, we are blowing up! The initial plan was to make decks that no hetro-conscious male would want to look at, let alone ride, but we’ve been on back order since noon today!
Get your orders in!
Stakes is high.