Thursday. 11:55 am. Another idea: Clown Porn. Wait! Someone already did it.
That’s pretty much how it goes with pornography genres: if you can think it- it’s out there. Smurf porn? Yup. Vampire? Duh; yes. Nun? consider it done. Musical porn? Yes. Seriously; there are x-rated movies featuring people performing sexual acts while singing in three point harmony. Welcome to planet earth.
But what’s my point? There’s no point really, I just wanted images of clowns fucking the crap out of each other to flash through your mind. I hate clowns. I could kill a clown. I can scarcely imagine shooting a dog, but I could very easily garotte a clown. Coulrophobia it’s called; ‘an abnormal or exaggerated fear of clowns’, but I don’t think there’s anything abnormal about being deathly afraid of clowns; they’re terrifying! And they must die. They must all die.
The Kinks wrote a song called ‘Death of a Clown’ and it’s my favorite song ever. Do you know why? Because a fucking clown dies.
Fucking clowns… Watch this.
Anyway, now you know how I feel about clowns, let’s move on to how I feel about puppets, cuckoo clocks, twins, and bank tellers. Actually, let’s not.
Now, why is there a big picture of Nick Cave at the top of this meandering screed? Because he’s awesome. Look at that hair for Chrisake! Excellent.
12:55 Pm. Done.
Wait! How do YOU feel about clowns? Do you want to brutally murder them too? Please write and let us know. Best clown murder fantasy wins a T-shirt!